An open letter to all African diplomats and Heads-of-State.

From: Sue Denim - Attorney at law and facilitator of Modalities.Dear African ex-Dictator/ Relative, friend, colleague or associate of ex-African Dictator/ Deposed/Deceased Head-of-State of small African Nation/ or friend, colleague, or associate of same or similar.

We (and I think I can speak freely for allmembers of the Ask-A-Drunk consortium here) have recently become vaguely aware of your 'embarrassment of riches'.
I speak, of course, of allthose secret bank accounts, stocks, bonds, divers investments, debentures, art treasures, jewellery, precious metal ingots, slush funds, cash-filled mattresses, and other assorted and various recently unfrozen assets that you seem so eager to place in the trust of absolute strangers.

However, that troublesome surplus wealth need no longer be a problem to you, because discrete and confidential help is now at hand!
I find I am able to offer you an immediate and absolutely guaranteed solution.

We at "Ask-A-Drunk Financial Disposal Services" can now provide a whole tranche of remedial fiscal opportunities. We can immediately put in place the modalities to relieve you, or your associate in a neighbouring state or country, of the burden of any type of liquid asset that you may find embarrassing, incriminating, or otherwise surplus to requirements.

Rest assured that confidentiality will be respected and guaranteed.

Simply post your bank account details, together with any PIN or password required, to this forum. (A scan of a sample signature would also be helpful). We will then arrange an entirely secret meeting between our representatives and your good self, or selves, where modalities, contracts, notes of good faith, etc, can be exchanged and signed.

Again, rest assured that your secret funds will be absolutely secure in our hands, as a personal meeting will be arranged at your convenience, and at the earliest possible opportunity, before any monies mysteriously disappear from your untraceable and illegal account(s).

We rely on your good-faith, greed, and gullible nature in this enterprise, and hope to be dealing with your fiscal disposal problems shortly.
Obviously, we rely on your total confidentiality in not speaking to anyone else of this matter, especially any genuine legal representative, fraud investigator or member of any police authority.

Thank you.

We remain; pp Ask-A-Drunk Financial Disposal Services.

S.Denim - LA.De.DA.DipNVQ.

-- Sue Denim (s.denim@aol.net), August 01, 2002

Answers

PS. No time wasters with less than $5 million in their accounts, please!

-- Sue Denim (s.denim@aol.net), August 02, 2002.