This web site offers you the chance to find out about a book called Escape On Foot. What is Escape On Foot? First and foremost, it is quite simply the best book ever written about me. But it is also much, much more than that. It describes a 70-mile solo hike through the Eagle Cap wilderness of northeastern Oregon, USA. And it has elks - many elks - more elks than you can shake a stick at.
For a limited time only this book is being made available to you, the reading public (along with any illiterates who may care to buy it) for the low, low price of US$17.95, plus shipping and fondling, er, handling. You may order your copy today by visiting this fabulous online book emporium. Don't hesitate! Click on the link this very instant!
Um. I don't hear any clicking.
I can't imagine why. If you had half a brain in your head you'd be clicking up a storm. This book could change your life! It could change your luck! It could rid you of unsightly facial hair and teach you to play the saxophone! And the chances of all this happening to you are simply astronomical! (By this I mean, of course, the chances against all this happening to you, but let's not dwell on the negative.) Instead, you may read this whole page of testimonials that I have concocted - or read these fascinating vital statistics.
If you require any more convincing that this exceptionally life-enhancing book is the smartest purchase you'll ever make - for you, your friends, your pets and that neer-do-well relative living in the RV in your driveway, I am prepared to let you read some of the text of Escape On Foot for absolutely free! Just click on the links below (you cheapskate).